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Knowing where to start or where to pinpoint the place when things for me started to go wrong is very hard but im going to start with year 10 at high school i think falling out with my 2 of my best friends Aimee and Keesha was the point where shit happened for me because we had been best friends for four years. but with everything bad comes a good and i joined a lovely group of girls and we had sooo many good times but throughout this all i was in love with this one guy at school called john and fucking hell i actually adored him and it used to like really get to me that he had no fucking idea what so ever or didnt have the same feeling back so i decided it was time to give up on that and  just move on and thats what i kind of did but i think i did it in spite just to forget about john.So i met this guy from a different high school called jack and he was so cute and we went on a date and things but nothing ever became of it. A month later i was at a gig again and I noticed this really good looking (what i thought back then ) nice guy who was friends with jack i didnt know that soon i would start talking to him and actually really fall for him because he was the first guy in a long time to actually take my mind 100% off john and i was litterally so happy but occasionally he would just not speak to me for a few days so i just thought maybe that was him however at the same time i became really good friends with his best friend tom and i invited him and his friends round one evening for drinks. we eneded up very drunk and i ended getting on very well with his friend elliot. it soon became apparent that scott had another girl n his life called emmy so that ship had sailed and i continued to talk to elliot and we dated for a few months however things with schott happened in between and generally he fucked everything up but i continued to see elliot until i found out he was seeing another girl at the same time :):) this was just fucking brilliant not only that but scott had officially got with emmy. we then went to leeds festival and had a fucking great time and it was soooooo funny and my 17th birthday was fucking fabolous too and so was louises 18th and i was so happy at this point but then shit started to take a turn for the worse and i got myself in to some depressive rut and i started failing college and i wasnt seeing my friends as much as they all pretty much fucking hated me for some reason. i then decided to drop out of college which i now probably regret because the real world is such a scary fucking place but yeah anyway i became friends with my old bestfriends from high school and towards the end of college i was pretty happy because i had them.and then probably the worst thing that has ever happened…happened my grandad died and sice then my life has been so fucking shit i dont even know what i want any more but i just want to fucking cry and punch everyone.i thought i had found a nice guy from my old college and i probably made the biggest mistake of my life sleeping with him but you really shouldnt regret something because it made me realise what a fucking dick i have become and how much i just dont give a fuck.so right now everyone hates me and i hate everyone and yeah i want to fucking die. so this is my life in a nutshell. you could say ive been fucked over or ive fucked people over or ive fucked people i shouldnt have but i couldnt really give a fuck right now i know who my friends are and i know who my enemys are and i know that you should never fall for anyone or have feelings or love anyone because nothing will last forever and everything has to come to an end somewhere along the line because right now i dont really see a future or a fucking point in life because all you do is die. society is a bitch for judging and making everyone be normal and thin and attractive and set the stone that you get married have a great job and house have kids and be all hapyy. all i want is vodka.mdma and some fucking dubstep please. fuck you all.fuck fuck fuckerty fuck all you fuckers that have fucked my head you bastards i hate you all.

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